Welcome to the next exciting blog from Disgraceland! Lets get strait into it, the weather really does suck balls at the moment, worst then that, the weather seam’s to enjoy sucking balls, and laughs when we all cringe at its disgustingness…
(note…this blog was typed when the weather was crap for 2 months strait)
Its hard to get moving, get up, and get going, but things have not been slow around Disgraceland..
This weather situation has thrown up another problem,…..HEATING
Heating a warehouse in special 3 pigs style sauce!
Pig 1 – the brick pig – (room still not complete) – electric heater
In true brick pig style, the easiest option was the best, and since there was no brick wall separating brick pig from the milk crate pig, brick pig went rite on in and grabbed milk crate pigs electric oil heater..
Brick pig had yet to construct his room at the writing of the blog, so really, the heater only served the purpose of heating sum one up when they stood in front of it.
No walls and shit heater 2/10 stars
Pig 2 – the milk crate pig
After having his 70’s oil element heater taken, the plastic pig new exactly what to do..Head strait to Bunnings and buy the biggest heater he could get his hands on! Using those trusty zip ties, milk crate pig locked the fucker on the roof…the result is below.
Radiating 400 degrees of pure UV heat, this baby slightly dims the whole warehouses lighting when it’s cranked up. You see it is a UV outdoor spotlight heater, connects to mains, uses a bit of power but will heat a room in seconds, it will also keep a room warm, if fully insulated
Oh wait, theirs more. The sexy redish glow is the perfect mood setter to any occasion, and according to the milk crate pig, sends the perfect message to any one who enters his home.
Basic insulated room, high end industrial heater – 7/10 stars
Pig 3 – the timber pig –
The ceiling on the timber pigs fortress is resembling the corps brides face with 4 different material’s being used. The four materials where, timber (of course) old thick curtains, plastic beer signs and LAZER LIGHT(that see through plastic that resembles corrugated iron.
Evan though it looks like a smashed crab, the roof kept in the heat, and a small electric heater was all that was needed to give timber pig a toasty warm room!!(oh and there was insulation placed on the roof, after all over 70% of all heat will be lost through the ceiling of a room, thanks Origin Energy web site!)
Of course the room still needed to be heated, so using the powers of Gumtree, this baby was bought!!
(That is not real flame, but it does a good job of tricking you into feeling warmer!)
Walls, roof, insulating and fake fireplace electric heater – gold star!
Now as you can read and see from the photos, allot has happened in the room building area, infact at the time this blog was posted, the rooms of plastic and timber pigs where as good as done. Of course friends helped, but there is only so many favours you can ask of your friends, don’t burn or bum them out, time to do it yourself!
STOCK UP ON CHEAP,GOOD TOOLS
TOP 5 TOOLS YOU WILL NEED
1 – cordless drill and drill bits!! Nothing gets done without a drill!!
2 – tape measure – lots of em, get 10! they go missing!! But are so important.
3 – good hammers – not the crap one your old man gave you, get a good one.
4 – electric saw – these baby’s are dicey at best, so use with caution!
4 – scissors, Stanley knife, sharp things – so many uses, will always go missing, but very vital.
Now a big generic hardware store like Bunnings is the obvious choice, and from experience, second hand tools can be a wast of money as they are dodgy and often parts are no longer available (unless it’s a great brand) DON’T BUY $2 SHOP TOOLS _ I WILL EXPLAIN LATER!! BUT RISIST THE TEMPTATION BUY NOTHING FROM THE $2 SHOP UNLESS ITS WORTH 2$!!
So with roofs over our heads, heaters keeping us warm, fridges storing our food, and fresh water running from our taps, you could say that we had covered all the basis for things that are “Needed for survival” so it was time to move on to the luxuries of life….like a shower, THAT’S RITE, 4 WEEKS, NO SHOWER!!!
(Brick pig has been, PRISON SHOWERING with the fire hose, if you live in Melbourne you know how frigin cold it gets, and he does this at 5 in the morn, props to brick pig, but really, just shower at friends houses like the other pigs did next time!)
In previous blogs I have presented photos and a 3d map of the warehouse, in these pictures its easy to see the toilet block at the back of the factory. We had decided early that this was the are that we where going to build our shower.
Measure twice, buy once!!
First thing first, we measured the fuck out of the toilet block, we needed all the measurements we could get our hands on. We did this so that when we bought our hot water system, shower base, hose for system, gas bottle ect we would get things THAT FIT! If they are to small its generally ok but if they are to big, you are screwed, so measure measure measure and get it rite, we didn’t, and now know how important it is.
Seek and you shall find
We went to town on the internet, searching all the various shopping sites for a shower tub and hot water system..seek and you shall find… and oh boy did we find!!
The Hot Water system was a E-Bay pick up from one of those mobs that ships cheap shit in from china and flogs it on E-Bay for 4 times the price, good racket really. This hot water system is an amazing little unit that can run of natural or LPG safely, gives you continua’s hot water FOR EVER!!! And is about the size of two suitcases stacked together.. It cost all of 150 bux and was shipped to our door within 3 days!
Life expectancy…..6 months :P
HANDY HINT!! – Second hand hot water systems are verry hard to transport!! After they have been first installed things begin to happen inside them and parts move.. Unless kept uprite and jolt free most hot water systems will never survive being moved after being installed..so be wary of secondhand hot water systems..
The bath tub was brand new, and the glorious part was that it fit exactly in the toilet block, BRILLIANT!!....900 x 900 is what the measurements read, we where happy, as this was going to be easy……oh how we where wrong!
Square bath round hole, with big bits of wood, and cement, and 500 year old render
The tub came first! So strait away it was moved into position in the toilet, and surprise surprise, it didn’t fit! These walls aren’t strait (or plum as they say in the tradie world) and are covered in 500 year old render!! To make maters worse, the ceramic toilet didn’t come out! Stuck into the ground!
So again we turned into little worker trolls and started to chisel away at the render, this shower was going to get done..We stunk to much to not make it happen!
With the walls clean from the render, we thought through the problem of the toilet.. There was only 2 solutions. Smash the dunny with a sledge hammer or build a big frame over the toilet and run PVC pipe into it…we didn’t have a sledge hammer, so we built the frame
Now we know how to use a hammer, us in Disgraceland use hammers all the time to fix stuff, just the other day I knocked a ball down from the ceiling with a hammer, ive seen the milk crate pig scratch himself with a hammer, so that being sed, we trusted the building of the shower frame to our trusty German master craftsmen we will call Gooonta Goodenthat!!
Goodenthat knows his shit and was happy to help out with this frame business’, he smashed it like Chriss brown smashed Rhiana, and the thing was finished and looking amazing in the main room…..awsome
Then Goodenthat began to swear
He never swears
How the fuck do we get it in! its to big to get through the door!! He yelled!
In true Disgraceland style, the answer was simple………we will kick the roof of :D
GOLDEN TIP TIME
As I mentioned before, always measure, but before you attempt anything, think about how that thing is going to get into where it needs to go!!! This rule applies to everything we are doing now! Putting a big TV or bookshelf in a room is dead easy when there is no door or wall….think about it before moving/building it.
Fight the shower!!! FIGHT,FIGHT, Fight the shower
So again the worker troll was summoned, and we wnt to work.
On these older type of ware house its not uncommon for there to be large timber beams used for structural purposes, and that what was holding up the ceiling in the toilet block. These timber beams are extremely heavy and will often have a hook shape cut out of them, in the end that is stuck in the wall, this hook helps the timber to be secure when they fill the hole that the beam has gone into with concrete.
And yes sir, that’s what we faced, with only a chisel, claw hammer, blind stupidity and brute strength
So we hammered, chiselled, pulled, hammered, chiselled pulled, cigi break, beer break, hammered, chiselled, pulled, hammered, chiselled pulled – and BOOM put come the beams!!
Next we lifted the frame over the walls of the toilet block, and slammed that puppy in place…actually it wasn’t that easy, but you get the drift…
Thank you Goodenthat, job well done!!
So then the simple task of putting the PVC draining pipe in place, and we where done!
And the lords of Disgraceland sed, let there be hot water – and there was!!
Next came the hot water system, it needed a home, and since it ran on LPG gas we thought that maybee a plumbeder
GOLDIN TIP! - MOST TRADIES ARE DICKS, they lie, over quote, never show up, wont do a cash job, always do things legely and the list goes on..
It was so hard to find a plumber who would just do us a favour, it’s a easy job, but for sum reason no one wanted to do it for under the price of “way to much”
So we did it ourselves!
So it goes like this rite….
Stage one – Water to hot water system – Using a high pressure, flexible 10mm pipe, found at a hardware store we ran water from the tap used to fill the toilet to the hot water system, plugging into the tap and hot water system where two female copper connectors, these connectors where covered with plumbers tape, lathered with the greatest plumbers stuff ever” BOSTON GLUER” and secured to the tube using screw couplings. In the middle of the pipe at shower level we put in an industrial tap, like what’s attached to a fire extinguisher to regulate the water flow
Stage two – Gas bottle to hot water system – Finding a BBQ on e-bay with a gas bottle(BBQ with Swap,n,go bottle was 60 bux, it costs 70 bux just to sign up with Swap’n’go!! Winner) screw gas bottle hose into hot water system, pray to the gods shit don’t get real any time soon! Make sure all washers are in place!!
Stage 3 – Hot water to person’s head – Same as stage 1 but attaching into a showerhead
Stage 4 - check for leaks – put soapy water on every connection, if it bubbles, pull attachment of, re tape, re glue, re secure, test again..This will show any water or gas leaks, so there is a lesser chance of a shit shower or wors, death
Stage 5 – Secure hot water system – We Dynobolted the system to the wall at a height where the flue(chimney) stuck out over where the ceiling once was, thus, no one gets gas poisoning or burnt – again – safety first kids!!
Stage 6 – Enjoy shower – This bit is private
So there we have it, an amazing feet under the circumstances, true ingenuity.. We had a working shower for under 400 bux! True, it was 3 feet of the ground, true, you get a birds eye view of the warehouse when showering and true, the gas situation is not to crash hot but for the time being it is AWSOME!!
That’s it for this instalment, allot has happened over the last few weeks, ppl have moved in, rooms have been completed, huge amounts of girly fabric have been found and used as walls…the list goes on….but that’s gona have to wait till next time
Andy V
